New Year

Well, I don't have a lot of time to write a super long post right now because we have a bunch of people over while we celebrate the new year. I'm currently being antisocial and hiding out in my room but I'm obligated to haul my ass out of bed and entertain the guests. Which I will...in a few minutes. Actually, I don't even think I'm antisocial. To be antisocial, you have to dislike people. I like people (sometimes). The reason I don't talk or hide out by myself is because I'm scared of people. So yes, dear reader, chances are if we met in real life, I'd scream bloody murder and back away from you like you have the black plague. I'll apologize beforehand.

As 2011 comes to a close, I've realized that not only am I going to be scribbling out /11 on all of my papers for the next few months, but I've done nothing notable or important this past year. (Unless you count the surgery my parents forced onto me, and even then, it's a rather unremarkable feat)

2012 will be different! This is the last year we'll ever have, according to the Mayans. I better do something interesting, hm? After I finish this post and make nice with the guests for a few hours, I'll compile my New Year's Resolutions. Except, instead of a list of vague things I want to do, it'll be a checklist of things I will have to do. To force myself to uphold these "resolutions", I'll probably be codependent and make someone I know hold me accountable for one (if not more) resolution.

Happy New Year! Say your goodbyes to 2011, whether it was a good or bad year, and welcome the new year! (I accidentally typed yar because when I blank out, I tend to think I'm a pirate) Maybe some other time I'll post my goals and make you in charge of one of them.

2011, good or bad year. Why?


What are your resolutions?

Live Blog with Cannibal Carrot Numero Dos

My writing has been stilted and almost nonexistent these past few days so yesterday I proposed another Word Goal Competition Thingy with my friend, Cannibal Carrot. If you weren't here for the past one (which lasted a weekend) and you're too lazy to go back and check my past posts, it's just a competition where we had to write 10k in two days. If you're worse than math than I am, it's 5k a day. This time, we're raising the bar. It'll be a one day deal, but instead of 5k, it'll be 6k. The bet's the same (although I was unaware we even had a bet until I checked her blog) If you don't write 6k today, you have to wear a dress to school on Mon--Tuesday.

9:40 am: Woke up. Looked at clock and then promptly went back to sleep. I stayed up until 12 something last night (this morning) because our dinner guests got drunk and couldn't tell time.

10:28 am: Checked Chloe's blog. No, no, no...opened up my word document and started to feel like shit. I'm aware this feeling will last all day.

11:16 am: Wrote for the past hour or so. The bad feeling didn't go away and now I hate my characters AND my writing. I earned breakfast, though.
WC: 1005/6000 Still way behind Chloe. She got a head start today. I wonder how much she has now...


11:43 am: Ate a breakfast of cookies, which will totally screw over my blood sugar level. Hello type two diabetes, I think I see you in my future! I found a piece of chocolate that will be my prize for reaching 2k.

12:27 pm: Wrote like hell, even though I'm a slow writer. Just wrote. Nothing else. The selfhatred is growing stronger.

WC: 2062/6000


12:53 pm: Finished the scene I was working on all morning. I've resorted to skipping around the story. Now I know it's never going to be finished and never going to be complete. *sigh*

WC: 2589/6000


12:54 pm: Going on an internet detour to cleanse my brain. Screw self control, I'll go crazy with my word doc all day.

1:00-1:59 pm: Alternated between surfing the internet and writing. I couldn't write without a little help, so I brought sexy Thomas back with all of his perverted glory. Blushed a lot while writing sexy scenes. Also paranoidly watched my bedroom door in case my parents wanted to come in and read over my shoulder.

WC: 3429/6000 I think I've earned my lunch.


2:40 pm: Pretty, pretty books. I think I'll be stupid and read you!

4:02 pm: Legend by Marie Lu is a FREAKIN' AMAZING book. The shitty feeling just increased tenfold. I think I'll keep the break going until it gets dark outside. For some reason it's easier to write during the night. And maybe the time will separate the shitty feelings and adoration from my writing.

5:33 pm: The sun is down. After a mind numbing hour of internet crap, it's time to return to THE WORK. Ugh, ugh, ugh...but ooh! Kissy scene. Oh wait...already wrote that.

5:46 pm: Procrastinated and made popcorn. Add said popcorn with sister while looking a her latest celebrity gossip magazine and dissing celebs.

6:11 pm: Wrote like the wiiind. (Even though the wind doesn't write) Mind numb. I can't feel my brain...

WC: 4570/6000 Only about 1.5k to go! Whoo! Chloe has yet to update. I'm frightened...


6:42 pm: Went on facebook while I was busy being embarrassed about writing a kissing scene. Checked Chloe's blog. No update. It's quite. Too quiet...

7:19 pm: Went and did the deed. Kissing scene is done.


WC: 5478/6000 I've earned my dinner. About 500 words left! Fight!


7:21-7:39 pm: Dinner. Spagetti and meatballs, yum yum!

7:58 pm: OHMYGOD! I reached 6k. I am done with this challenge. BS-ed a bunch with girly conversations, perverted guy antics, and kissing. Lots of kissing.

Final WC: 6004/6000 I might write more today, but I doubt it. I'm feeling kind of worded out right now.

Christmas Eve

I tried to include the other fun holidays in my previous post (I know, it's bad form to ditch a blog for months and then blog two days in a row. What can I say? I like to keep you guys on your toes) and I kind of failed, but this post will be a quick post. It's Christmas Eve, so I'm supposed to be spending time with the family instead of hiding away in my room like a hermit.

So my AMAZING WRITER/CLIMBER/A BUNCH OF OTHER COOL THINGS FRIEND decided to be more awesome than usual and drew an Infernal Devices cartoon that pertains to my twitter name (@llbroken_angell) So I just had to post it here to show you all how awesome she is. She's the same friend who sent me the hilarious list telling me why I should lend her Clockwork Prince. Yeah, we be book junkies.

Isn't awesome!? She has a blog too. It's pretty cool n' stuff so you should totally check it out here. 

Twas the night before Christmas...oh wait, I lied, that's tomorrow

It's one day before Christmas Eve. Or the eve of Christmas Eve. Or the day after four days before Christmas. Or the fifth day of Hanukkah. Or four days before Kwanza. Yeah, pick which ever name you want, but it's still the same day. My family and I are finally home after a grueling ten hour car ride. Family trips are fun...in theory. Because in real life, ten hours in a tiny (well, big) car, crammed up against my pointy brother and younger sister while the cow stink from the hoard of farting cows outside wafts into the car is a Bad Thing. And Bad Things are not fun. Part way through, my dad and my mom got into a very loud argument over directions while we were following a GPS. Confused? Yeah, I was too. For the entirety of the argument, I pretended to sleep so my parents wouldn't turn around and scream at me. My bitter personality and snark are not appreciated and I sound like a lame pep talker when I try to be nice. I have this terrible habit of making a bad situation worse. But honestly, I don't do it deliberately. For someone who calls herself a writer, I'm not very good with words.

Moving on, it's great to be home for the holidays. The tree is lit, the lights outside are winking, and all that's missing is a cozy fire. But our Christmas tree kind of blocks the fireplace, so we can't light it. Well, we could but then the tree would catch on fire and eat all of our presents and the entire house. (Random thought, but I saw a "crackling hearth" DVD for sale at Barnes and Noble. It was seriously just a video of a fire in a fireplace. Who'd waste eight dollars on that? More importantly, who'd spend, like eight hours recording a controlled fire?)

I think the holiday cheer's finally catching up to me. My little sister started turning on the Christmas songs and baking cookies in the beginning of December. She insisted we get our tree as soon as the month changed and we had to DECORATE IT RIGHT THEN AND THERE. When I was younger, (I know I'm still young. I just feel like an old lady) I'd always be the one who insisted we HAD to decorate our tree. This year, I hung about four ornaments before getting bored and leaving. I find that every year, it takes longer and longer for me to get hyped up about the holidays. It's almost like I don't care anymore. I didn't write a Christmas list until a week ago, and by then everyone had already bought their gifts. And the kicker is that I still don't care. Don't get me wrong, I had a blast buying gifts for my family and friend(s) but I don't expect very much from other people. Mommy, am I depressed? Or am I just some strange, pathetic creature with no feelings?

Oh jeez, and this soul finding rambling stuff comes out right after I declare a happy thing. Remind me to blog earlier in the day when I'm not as tired, okay? I don't know why, but after ten I get really depressing. As in, just by reading this post, I've already sucked away part of your soul. Sorry about that. Really. I'll give it back in a few days. I promise I'll wash it before I give it back to you. It'll be all sparkly and pretty and shiny and new. I swear.

When do you guys usually start feeling the holiday buzz? (And I'm NOT talking about the alcohol *glare*)

What did you ask for this year?

Movies

There's this fairly old belief that movies totally screw over a book. But...but what about movies that just suck? There's no book to compare to, just a really bad movie. The same goes for books, but I'm currently trapped at one of my mother's friend's house and there's this really weird movie on about a dog who used to be human who's a total asshole. (I'm a run on sentence fiend when I'm sleep deprived)

In any story, things have to make sense. I mean, it's nice to leave some things to be explained later or let the reader/viewer figure it out themselves, but there's a point where a reader/viewer will go "WTF" and leave. I reached that point when two dogs began to speak to each other telepathically. Sadly, it was a choice between gossiping fifty-year-olds and a really crappy movie. I stuck with the really crappy movie.

Generally, you're supposed to root for, or at least support the main character. It doesn't always happen, but the author's supposed to make the main character likable. Sure, they'll have flaws, but still, LIKABLE. The main character of this movie is a really adorable lab that used to be human. I mean come on, he's a DOG! Everyone loves dogs. But the movie makers still managed to make the dog a total dick. They managed to make you hate an adorable, fluffy doggy. Now that takes some hard work. The dog bit his wife's new husband while the man was driving and looking for his sick son in a snowstorm. Say it with me, "What a douche!"

And then the dog who can speak with the main character dog telepathically just died. At the end of the movie he came back as a telepathic squirrel. Um...what? *blinks* I know that I'm good at predicting endings and that most people hate it, but don't feel too accomplished by stumping me with a crackpot ending.

Rambly rant over. The bottom line is that plot twists are good, encouraged even, but don't write a story that makes so little sense that your readers wonder if you take drugs before you hit the keyboard.

Sorry for my crude language. When I get really tired, I tend to resort to dirty jokes and cussing. It's not good. Not good at all. I'm sorry. Oh pooh, this means I'm a bad person, doesn't it?

Have you ever read a book that makes no sense or a movie without a plot?

I think my friends are using me...

Okay, sorry for being a sucky blogger and not blogging anything lately. I'm just lazy. Are those shoes new? Love what you've done with your hair by the way. I think you've lost weight! :D


Well, right this second, I'm typing without the help of my right ring finger. Somehow, being the complete idiot I am, I screwed it up. But that's not what this post is about. 


I'm a boring person. I don't like taking risks and I lack a working sense of humor. So why do my friends keep me around? Am I some kind of charity case? Do they lack the guts to kick me out? Do they have extremely bad judgement? Do they enjoy mocking me behind my back?


Nope. I have books.


And I've buddied up with a circle of book crazed teenage girls. It's like be a drug dealer. They just keep coming back for more and they CAN'T leave me because doing so cuts off their steady supply of new books. Because I'm the freakin' supplier.* Seriously. One of my friends had a withdrawal via facebook at one in the morning. **

• I finished Clockwork Angel 35 minutes ago. I still can't sleep. So, I'm going to message you the reasons why you should try EXTRA ESPECIALLY HARD to get that book to me.
• 1. [removed friend's name] is a TROLL. Trolls are illiterate. They can't read! She's simply stealing the book! Probably to eat it.
• 2. I am not a troll. I would not eat it.
• I just realized that I didn't say what book you need to get to me! Well, if it wasn't obvious,
• GIVE ME CLOCKWORK PRINCE.
• please?
• 3. I will not squish its cover! You'll see tomorrow…that is to say, later today, that Clockwork Angel is still all rounded and pretty!
• 4. After reading it, I would be a good girl and read The Lost Hero.
• 5. Plus, after reading it, I would move on to Iron King. Although I may read that tonight (22 hours from now or so) and Mia wouldn't be pissed because I wouldn't take forever to return her book!
• 6. You're hella cool! And sucking up to people totally works when you want stuff from them! Stuff like, for instance, books. All hypothetical of course.
• 7. I will spam the HELL out of your twitter with requests for the book it you do not do this, and if you reply JARROD PERKINS WILL SEE YOUR TWEETS AND JUDGE YOU.
  
  

  
  

  • 8. I will stop threatening you if you give me the book.
  • 9. NOTHING happens between Jem and Tessa in Clockwork Angel. And there are rumors that STUFF happens in Clockwork Prince. Uh, hello? Dying here?
  • 10. Jem needs to punch Will in the face.
  • 11. The tenth and eleventh points may not be supporting my cause, but they're true. Soooo true! I NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO ALL OF THE UNDERWATER AUTOMATONS! Did they go, "pffft zap!" and die? Or did they magically have gills all along?
  • 12. I TOTALLY HEARD THAT THE DOCTOR COMES AND TAKES JACE AND SIMON BACK IN TIME TO MEET JEM AND WILL AND JEM AND WILL ARE ALL LIKE, "LAAAAAAAAAME."
  • 13. I'm actually starting to become tired, so my reasons are getting hilarious. Hilarity = Persuasion, right?
  • 14. I AM A WONDERFUL HUMAN BEING. With love and goodness in my heart. I deserve this book.
  • 15. I will get you a FABULOUS Christmas present if you bring me the book. FAB. U. LOUS. We're talking Amazon / Barnes and Noble gift cards here.
    
    

    
    

    • 16. Or another present, if you want. As long as it's in my wimpy budget.
    • 17. YES, SIXTEEN IS A LEGITIMATE REASON.
    • 18. So is seventeen.
    • 19. I'm getting waaaaaaay too tired.
    • 20. You gave me Clockwork Angel! You did this to me! WWWWHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?
    • 21. Do it for Jem! Bring me Clockwork Prince for JEM! The poor guy has terminal cancer, for Angel's sake
    • 22. I just made an EPIC reference to The Infernal Devices back there.
    • 23. The world is spinning. I'm reallly tired, aren't I?
    • 24. You're welcome. I am a fanTABULOUS friend, sending you an incredibly long message at 1:20 in the morning
    • 25. I Facebook-messaged you this instead of texting you, which you should be thankful for. This so would have woken you up.
    • 26. 

      Unattractive photos of me have been posted on Facebook!
      The book would be comfort.
      Kind of like ice cream sundaes.
      Or bunnies. Or rainbows.
    • 27. I only just learned how old Church is! Cassandra Clare can't leave me with such a cliffhanger! WHAT HAPPENS TO CHURCH IN THE TIME BETWEEN TID and TMI? haaahahah!
    • 28. The Mortal Instruments is TMI. lolololololololol
    • 29. CLOCKWORK PRINCE IS NOOOOOOT TMI!
    • 30. Please. I'm sleeping now. Consider my 

      offers/threats/thoughts while being delirious.
      
      
      Have you ever felt like you were being used? Have you ever been used? Have you ever thrown away your dignity on facebook?
      
      
      *I can't believe I just compared myself to a drug dealer.
      
      
      **I'm not being a heinus bitch by posting this. My friend who sent this message to me actually suggested I turn it into a blog post.
      
      
      
      
      
      

Last Day of Live Bloggin' Fun

It's the last day of our first crazy live bloggin' experience and I've started really late. Yesterday (previous post) I took a quick trip to the library to grab some sexy little books. Hehehehe! That was such a bad idea! I read one yesterday and then another this morning. I'm actually considering to give up and power through my books instead of words. Eeek! The good thing is that Chloe's chilling around the Bay Area today.

Chloe's Blog I don't think she'll be doing a lot of live blogging today. >:D

9:02 am: Woke up. Stayed in bed because it was warm. After I got bored of being warm, I ran downstairs to grab a book from the huge stack I got from the library. Sat on the couch. My dog joined me. He's warm. <3

10:02 am: Finished Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr. Sat back and processed the story for a minute before I got bored.

Daily Word Goal: 0/5000

Day 2 of Live Bloggin'

I'm in a crappy mood. Writing this much is kind of hard.

Saturday 8:40 am: Woke up reluctantly. Started writing even more reluctantly.

Saturday 9:04 am: Ate breakfast. Stopped my reluctant writing.

Saturday 10:26 am: Chloe's twitter and blog are quiet. Too quiet. Still haven't started writing yet.

Daily Word Count: 459/5000 I'm feeling screwed already.

Somewhere between 10:26 am and 11:35am: Wrote a lot. Checked twitter a lot. Checked Chloe's blog obsessively.

Saturday 11:35 am: Made 2k. I've earned my lunch. Crunchy noodles, ftw!

Daily Word Count: 2165/5000 Almost halfway there! All's quiet in Chloe land. *fearful whisper*

Saturday 12:07 pm: Finished eating lunch. Surfed the internet. Look at pretty pictures on deviantart. Tried to ignore Chloe's pestering about a total word count. (It didn't work) I made green tea an hour ago and forgot about it. Now it's cold and way too strong. My Edward tea tastes bad. :(

Daily Word Count: Same... Total: 8916/15000


Saturday 12:12 pm: Watched an episode of the Vampire Diaries. My nose is running. I think I'm coming down with a cold.

Saturday 12:48 pm: Wrote a little bit. Mostly surfed deviantart. I also snuggled with my dog but he doesn't seem to like it.


Daily Word Count: 2527/5000 Halfway done! Total: Who the hell cares? :D Chloe's been busy...God dammit!


Saturday 1:07 pm: Decided to start writing after staring at twitter for ten minutes. No, people aren't going to tweet just because I want them to. I checked Chloe's blog. Ha! She's doing bio! And she has a group meet up! Started writing at a snail's pace. Stopped and ate leftover crunchy noodles. Debated whether or not to return to my writings. Started writing.

Saturday 1:36 pm: Still writing. Managed to reach 3k. I'm starting to feel burned out. *sighs* I decided to distract myself by texting my friend even though I should be using this time to get farther ahead of Chloe. Thing's are starting to slow down...


Daily Word Count: 3172/5000 Total: 9923/15000 Chloe's blog is quiet again...I can only hope she's doing biology instead of writing.


Saturday 1:40 pm-3:37 pm: Writing really slowly. Burned out. Grumpy. Paranoid. Sent a bunch of texts to Chloe and tweeted her a bunch. No reply. Maybe she's writing like a crazy person and she's passed me. Still paranoid and beginning to resemble a rabid animal.

Saturday 3:37 pm: A cyrptic tweet from Chloe. "It's still going". What can this mean? Is she still doing biology work?

Saturday 4:05 pm: Wrote around one hundred words. Texted a friend. Got distracted by TV. Heading off to the library even though I should write until I reach 5k.


Daily Word Count: 4283/5000 Total: Too lazy to tell you


Saturday 4:52 pm: Back from the library. All of those books made me kind of giddy. And sick. My stomach's killing me again. (No, I didn't eat the books) 700 words left before 5k. But I wanna reeeeeeeeaaaaad. My stomach and my headaches are trying to overthrow my mind. Bad body. Bad. I still want to read. I picked up Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr and The Forest of Hands and Teeth by Carrie Ryan. See my dilemma? Chloe's started writing again.

Saturday 5:40 pm: I finished my daily word goal! Whoooooooo! Watching Psych and eating chocolate!

Daily Word Count: 5751/5000 Total: 11808/15000 Chloe's on a roll! I'm worried...

Live bloggin' love

So a while back Stephenie Perkins, author of Anna and the French Kiss and Lola and the Boy Next Door, made a bet against Beth Revis, the author of Across the Universe. Naturally, because I have no independent thoughts, I decided it'd be a great idea to make a crazy bet with my friend. We mused over it for a while but finally decided on the looser's punishment. Oh, and we made a word goal. But the punishment's kind of the interesting part. The goal is to write 10k words this weekend and as a last minute thing, we allowed Friday evening to count too.

The looser has to wear a dress to school on Monday. My friend, Chloe, and I are not the prissy types. Hell, I only own one dress and I'm fairly certain it'll get me dress cut. So yeah, I CAN'T LOOSE!

Chloe's Blog
www.cannibalcarrot.blogspot.com

Check out our twitter distractions. (Us trying to distract the other person) It's rather amusing.
https://twitter.com/#!/lBroken_angel Mine

https://twitter.com/#!/CannibalCarrot Her's

Friday 3:40 pm: Home from school. Eat asian ice pops. Omnomnomnom... Discuss Divergent by Veronica Roth with brother.

Friday 4:00 pm: Heeeeeey there, internet. <3 I love you. Please marry me.

Friday: 4:28 pm: Set up blog. Watch the Vampire Diaries with sister because she thinks if she watches it without me, the monsters will jump out of the screen and eat her.

WC: 4887/1500
Daily Word Goal: 0/3000

Friday 4:58 pm: Still watching the Vampire Diaries. I loooove you, Damon. Also surfing deviant art and holding a one-sided conversation with my dog. I checked Chloe's blog and I'm feeling a bit panicky. But I don't want to write...

Friday 5:05 pm: Holy shit, I think my stomach's trying to kill me! It huuuuuuurts...*whimpers*

Daily Word Goal: 0/3000

Friday 5:30 pm: Stomach's better. Chattin' with parents.

Friday 5:47 pm: Finished eating dinner. Going shopping. Screw writing.

Daily Word Goal: 3/3000

Friday 6:00 pm-8:25 pm: Shopping. I made Chloe come with me. >:3 The fluffy, the shiny, the squishy...

Daily Word Goal: Do you really have to ask?

Friday 9:08 pm: I wrote a little, tried to distract Chloe a lot. She's trying to use Damon against me. Pssshhh....I'm using him against her as well.

Daily Word Goal: 536/3000 It's improvement...

Friday 9:28 pm: Got to the 1k marker. Decided to reward myself with a short break.

Friday: 9:30-10:29 pm: Watchin' Psych. Realized that the break was too long. Stopped. I'm feeling kind of tired now.

Friday: 10:30 pm: CANDY! YOU WILL MAKE ME HYPER, NO?

Daily Word Count: Too lazy to check.

Friday 11:12 pm: I'm too tired to think. Or write. Or just move my fingers in ways that make words. I think I'm going to call it a night. (Grr, Chloe's probably rejoicing at this news)

Daily Word Count: 1864/3000 SCREW YOU!
WC: 6751/15000






PS: Noni!? Ohmygod, is that you? *tackles*

Crazy Hours

As you probably know, I'm a high school student. Now, based upon your personal high school experience, you boo or cheer. I'm hoping for some boos because I hate school to the point of extreme abhorring and I kind of hope I'm not the only one. Okies, I'm going to stop talking about school before I get crazy depressed and do something I'll later regret. Because, you know, crazy hours = crazy mind. And crazy mind = crazy actions. Therefor, crazy hours = crazy actions!

Yeah, that was my lame excuse for math. I can't believe I'm in Geometry.

Oh, back on topic. Ha! (Still of topic, I guess) This time I have an excuse for jumping from topic to topic. It's about two in the morning and guess what? Everything's funny at two in the morning. *giggles*

I wish I had a nice job that started late or a nice part time job when I'm fresh out of college. I'll be able to do these crazy late hours without totally screwing up my sleep cycle. Doesn't that sound like fun? I have a love/hate relationship with writing in the wee hours of the morning. I love it because I write A LOT because I'm too tired and zombied out to catch typos. I hate it because I go back to it when I actually have half a working brain and wonder what the hell I meant.

I suppose, in a way, it's like being drunk of high.

Except, you know, it's strictly legal. And I can sorta kinda maybe remember things.

I'd be able to remember if I did anything stupid/hooked up/dirty danced. Haha, I'm joking. I'm a nice person. :P Maybe not so much of a nice person rather than a boring person.

Well yeah, pointless post as usual.

But late night/early morning writing kind of rules/sucks. I haven't really passed a final judgement on it yet.

I found this little baby from a tweet by Lauren Destefano. :) It's great, yes?

Insecure Writer's Group

Today is the day where the the insecure writers post one insecurity! Whoo~ I think all writers are insecure people. For goodness sake, what made us decide to hole up and make up characters instead of socializing with real ones? Unless you're schizophrenic, of course. Then you really have no other option.

Let's get crackin'! Here's my insecurity.

My stories suck.

Yeah, that's right. I know that every single writer thinks like this every now and then (ok, a lot) but it's all I can think about. Sometimes I'll stare at my screen with a panicked expression and my sister will snicker at me. I'm new to writing. It's a given that my stories will suck. 

But I still can't get over how terrible they are! Every single sentence sounds forced. My characters lack personality, or at the very least, a consistent personality. My main character is whiney and way too angry at the world. And the list goes on and on and on and ooooon~ Street lights~

Gah, I got sidetracked again. The quality (or lack of) in my stories depresses me. I must be masochistic because I still write anyways. It totally kills my social life and self esteem but I can't seem to stop! Who needs drugs when you have writing?

Procrastination

I like to think of procrastination as a disease, even though I have a lot of control over it. Like right now, for example. I know that I should be working on my Spanish project for orals tomorrow, but I've gotten this far and I want to bang my head against mi escritorio until my head's reduced to a bloody stump of a neck. Lovely, eh? (What, the run on sentence or the mental image?) Oh, other Julie's back! I suppose four hours straight of schoolwork is enough to make drive anyone insane.

But yes, as writer's we also deal with a lot of procrastination. I'm not the only one who has an irresistible need to check my twitter every few seconds or read another blog post, am I? Because if I am, then I'm a really pathetic creature.

The point of this extremely pointless and rambling post is that you can beat procrastination. Get your butt in the chair, turn off the internet, and write.

No, you cannot use laundry as an excuse.

...

Well, I better follow my own advice. Off to finish the Spanish! Ugh...did I mention that I'm going to fail?

How did you become a writer?

I have a lot of wakeup calls from life, something I think happens because the universe is sick of my bullshit. You hear about people's stories on how they discovered they were writers; a heartwarming story of a kind teacher, crazy antics turned words, or years of not fitting in and finally finding your niche in life. Personally, I love those stories. I've never had a teacher come up to me and tell me, "Julie, I think you'll become an author when you grow up." Mostly, my teachers ignore me. I'm the quiet girl who sits through the entire class without speaking a word. I'm just a painkiller after the hangover.

I wish I had a reason for writing. I really do. Last year, more than anything in the entire world, I wanted my English teacher to come up to me and tell me that I was a good writer. We did a short story in the Hero's Journey format and I adored it! We spent almost a month writing, in and out of class. After the stories were graded and over with (which took a long time. My teacher got really sick-too sick to do anything other than sleep) I looked at my grade sheet.

To my excitement, there was a little note to the student, written in red ink. Mine said, "Great job! What pretty words!"

...

I was crestfallen. But I got over myself pretty quickly. Where would I be if I wrote for other people? I'd be chasing trends that I don't care about and trying to be just like them.

I became a writer because no one else would listen to me. Now, I take my words and try to make them useful. I wanted to create my own world. I'm not very good at it--hell, I haven't even finished one novel sized piece yet.

Maybe I write because I can't stand reality and I need to take baby steps into healing.

I don't know.

But the most important part is the most obvious; I write.

School

My school tries to force a silent reading time onto us because most teens don't like reading. Le Gaspe! (No hating, please. I don't take French.) I know right? How can someone not enjoy reading? It sounds impossible. Moving on...so most kids don't like silent reading time. They'd rather gossip about who knows what and giggle like their brains were replaced with marshmallows. (Oh great, I sound antisocial and bitter now. Not that I am...*guilty face*) I have this evil teacher who loves dumping loads of homework onto unsuspecting teens on the first day of school. Two actually. Wait, no, three. Ok, so I have three evil teachers who enjoy giving teens homework while we're in a hazy "wtf am I doing here?" kind of mindset. Then again, that's me all year. But one of these three demonic teachers holds class during silent reading time. Guess what? She doesn't let us do silent reading. Apparently "imagination fluff and creativity has no room in a science lab". Hello? Most of the scientific breakthroughs needed imagination and creativity. And girls like me need a little silent reading at school to prevent mental breakdowns. Are you retarded? I know I am. My teacher kind of reminds me of the darling little lady below. Except she's a million times older with pure white hair.

I can't stand another day of school. :( Tomorrow's Friday! I have a test in math. The good outweighs the bad?
...
Yeah right.

Camp Nanowrimo Progress

To be honest with y'all, (not Southern, I just like saying y'all) I'm a procrastinator. I can't do anything without a deadline and solid reason. Most of the time, I wind up doing school projects the day before it's due. So naturally, I don't get straight A's. If I do everything half assed, then I shouldn't expect full results. And I don't. (Total lie) Ok, school analogies aside, it totally effects my writing. How? Well, um...everything? I'm trying to do Camp Nanowrimo for August and I was on a roll. I was on a roll until three days ago, that is. Three days ago, my mental drive crashed. (Whoohoohoo, who said anything about being sane? No? You didn't think anything about sanity until now? Oh...) Now I'm in a writing slump. I hate my story. I hate the beginning, the middle, and the future end. I hate my characters. I just hate everything about it. Sooooo...I'm not sure if I can continue. I convinced a friend of mine to join on the mighty fine writing adventure but I want out. *tightens noose* Everyone (meaning three people, two of which I don't actually know) says I should stick it out until the end. But here's the problem...

I. Don't. Wanna.

(cue tantrum)

I'm trying to coax myself into writing again and I don't want to spend the 31st of August crying my eyes out and pounding random words (mainly curse words) into my word doc while thinking "Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. I should've gotten more done before the deadline's only a few hours away". Um...sound familiar, anyone? *coughmecough* Yeah, that's how I feel before a project's due. It doesn't help that my brother takes 30 minutes to do the same project and gets a better grade than me. (Sorry, I got distracted again) Well, I hate that panic.

Deep breath, Julie.

So there you go, baby steps. Today I managed three moderately sized paragraphs and tomorrow I'm aiming for two pages. It's not a lot but it's better than nothing. (Plus, I kind of want to know what it's like to crazy type a few minutes away from the end. Will it be like a writing high if I make it?)

Ohmygod, how the hell am I supposed to keep my characters consistent if I can't even be consistent in what I want? *screams*

WriteOnCon

This has nothing to do with WriteOnCon, but I've wasted a lot of my summer reading fashion magazines or browsing online store catalogues. I'm chunky. I really hope that I'm not fat but 92 lbs is a lot. Looking at picture after picture of gorgeous models doesn't help my self esteem very much. *mutters* I better start a new skincare routine, learn how to use makeup, and loose ten pounds. But that wasn't the point of this post. I just threw that in to add a little "fluff" to this post so it'll look longer. ;D Really, though. I've gotta loose weight...

WriteOnCon is amazing. I've spent the last two days glued to my computer (see the problem?) just watching/reading the articles on this site. There's one day left! After August 18th, it's done for this year. It's geared towards writers that have MC's 18-years-old or less but there are a lot of general ideas that can be applied to any genre of writing. Kiersten White and Lauren Oliver have vlogs/articles with advice, so get your lazy ass over there! Write On Con covers the stages from the first sentence to publication! It's an online writers' conference and it's absolutely free~ What are you waiting for? Oh, the link? Well here it is!

http://writeoncon.com/

Now what are you still doing here? :/ Shoo! Scram!

First Drafts

I've spent a lot of my summer reading stories on inkpop. Some of the stories (coughanythingbyyuffieproductions) look like they belong on bookshelves. Hell, I spent a good ten minutes comparing her stories to some of the books on my shelves. Her's were better than a good deal of 'em. But reading inkpop is disheartening to a writing n00b like me. So many of the stories are in their first draft stage and they defy the only rule of first drafting. (Ok, one of the many rules) What is that rule? You may ask. (No, not really. Thinking the question's fine. If you actually asked your computer that aloud, you may want to consider seeing a therapist) Well, the rule I was talking about is the rule that "First Drafts Must Suck". In Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott it's something more like "First drafts have permission to suck" (not the exact words) but in my case, it's just "First Drafts Must Suck". Actually, it's more like "All my writing must suck" but you get my point. (No, actually you don't. There's too much rambling and not enough getting to the point)

Ok, that's a way cuter verson of my face when I read a good first draft. Just image less fur, smaller ears that are on the side of my head, 90 more lbs, and a piggie face.


Hmmm...I think I may have strayed a little too much off topic because I don't remember what the point to this post was. Something about first drafts, obviously because of the title...Uh, oh yeah. I have to keep reminding myself that first drafts can suck. Even though the first drafts on inkpop don't, mine can. It's the only that keeps me from chucking my laptop at the wall and screaming. It's hard, but afterwards I can go back and (try to) fix everything. I need to make a poster that says "The point of a first draft is to get your shit on the paper" and hang it in my room. Forget the fact that my mom hates when I cuss and that there's a high chance that she'd tear it down and burn it. (Shit on paper. Better start smearing poop around like a monkey...)

Well, I should get back to drafting but I can't stand the sight of my own writing. So I'll just hide in the corner and grow mushrooms because school starts in a week. (Ouran high school host club referance, anyone?)

**Therapist - Has anyone else noticed that "therapist" is "the rapist" minus the space? Hmmmm...
***OHMYGAWD SCHOOL STARTS IN A WEEK AND I'M GONNA DIE! I HATE SCHOOL! PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE TIME TRAVEL ME BACK TO JUNE WHEN SUMMER VACATION WAS JUST STARTING!

Hi!

Hey~

Well, hi there. I’m Julie. I’m no stranger to the blogosphere, but I used to own this super secret blog. (No, I will not give you the url) If you read my short “About Me” section, then you’ll know that I want to be an author. If you were lazy and decided not to read it, now you know!

I know I have a long way to go before being a published author but I’m not one of those “I’ll write a book one day” kind of people. “One day” may as well be equivalent to “never” because that kind of thinking gets you nowhere. I’m young but I’m using today to write and learn more about literature. (I’m lying when I say “learn more about literature” Most of the literature I read is YA. I have an unhealthy addiction to YA novels. Hellooo? Hot guys and paranormal creatures. What’s not to like? ;D)

I have a list of my imaginary (meaning fictional) boyfriends, but I’m afraid to post it up here because of all those rabid fangirls. Including me, of course. I’m a very rabid fangirl and will spend hours arguing with my friends over who gets who. I always end up with the coolest one(s). It’s only because they’ll go “Meh, they don’t exist. Who cares?” Well I care. I happen to care A LOT.

As you can see, I have a…love for using parenthesis. Don’t mind me too much. Just think of me as one of those crazies with a million personalities. There, that should fix it. No? Well, I suppose I’ll have to lighten up a little on my parenthesis. –sob-

I’d love to learn more about writing (I sound like an idiot. Dur dur durrr) so if you have any advice for a novice, drop me a line, ‘kay? ;D

Well here goes! My writing journey feels official now that I have this savvy blog. (You like? I know. I’m so good with technology.)