Friday, February 10, 2012

Confusion and Hiatus

This is probably one of the stupidest things I'll ever say, but I think I'm falling out of love with writing. Instead of this fun, amazing, escape from reality that I used to feel, everything feels like work. I'll write 400 words and then feel like it's complete crap. (which, it totally is, of course. but for once, I'd like to just think otherwise) I'm just slogging through word after word while my frustration grows stronger and stronger.

While I write, I think about how much I hate my prose. I think about how inconsistent my characters are and how two dimensional. I think about my mom telling me that I should stop reading trash and that I should read some nonfiction instead. I hate my writing. I hate my story. Heck, I even hate my characters. There's almost no enjoyment anymore.

While I have a bet in the works with my lovely friend Chloe from Cannibal Carrot which means I can't actually quit writing for very long, I'm still going to take a break. I just need some time to think things through.

Don't mistake this for quitting. I've invested too much time into this to give up. I've spent SO much time on the internet learning about the publishing industry and how to hone in on my craft. At the core of things, I know that I still love writing.

I just need a little time to sort out my head. Like my bedroom, it's a complete mess. The REAL part of high school is looming on the horizon, as well as a few other stressing future events, and I have to sort out my goals.

Which will have to be SCHOOL before writing. It'll be super hard, considering the fact that my brain goes like "NONONONONO!" when someone even mentions school.

Wish me luck!

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